ABOUT THE FEAR OF FAILURE AND WHAT THE EGO ACTUALLY HAS TO DO WITH IT

Think of a happy day. Imagine you are walking through a beautiful garden. The sun is shining brightly and the flowers around you are blooming with joy. You are tumbling around in the cool water and the world around you looks so unreal.

Suddenly you turn in one direction and you see thick, dark clouds wrapping the sky and the sky is getting darker and darker. You can't move any further. You're now stuck in the middle of nowhere. The darkness you saw is not the weather.

It is what happens when you stay away from your inner happiness and surrender to your ego. It is a feeling inside you that makes you feel different and special from everyone else.

Ego is also related to self-image and self-esteem. Ego problems in relationships are responsible for everyone's failure and can also be a real disturbing factor.

What is the ego?

We are not talking here about the Freudian definition of the ego - a kind of mediator between the id (lower desires) and the superego (idealistic desires). What we mean here is the ego, which keeps you trapped in your own little world, separate from the present moment.

In the past, the ego had an important job: it made sure we were alert and aware of our surroundings in case a saber-toothed tiger was lurking around the corner. Nowadays, we don't encounter such dangers as often. But the ego (busy little thing that it is) needs to feel busy and important. It does so by evoking fear, self-judgments, and judgments of others.

How does the ego show up in our lives?

Think about where your fears come from. I bet many of them have to do with future projections (e.g., "If I don't get the raise, then..." or "What if I never meet anyone...?" or even "What happens if she/he can do more than me or we do the project better?"). Have you ever thought that the future exists only in your head and that we can achieve less alone?

All these future events that your ego worries about - are on the one hand a projection of social paradigms that we have learned in order to survive and on the other hand they reflect your inner; the fear of failure. They don't exist. I mean, maybe you don't get the project you wanted. What happens then? Well, you will deal with it in the moment, just as you have always dealt with any difficulty. Projecting and worrying about it is a useless waste of your energy. When you find yourself projecting, ask yourself this question: Can I do anything about it right now? If the answer is no, then stop worrying. Pay attention to your breath and allow it to bring you into the moment. Do something that brings you joy. If the answer is yes, then stop worrying and take action.

The same goes out for the past. The ego loves to keep us trapped there by repeating old narratives, perceived mistakes, and old regrets. What are these obsessions good for? You probably learned your lesson and are applying it to future decisions. You did the best you could.

Your ego thrives on separating you from the moment and from others who share that moment with you.

Free yourself from your ego:

1. accept all your mistakes & work with them

A good way to work on all your ego problems is to accept your mistakes. You know that everyone makes mistakes at certain times, and it's natural to make a mistake. But being stubborn and egotistical is not a good thing.

2. Knowing that together you are less alone:

It is very important to be aware of your limits. You should know that you don't have to be the best at everything and that there are people who can do things better. But you should also remember that you are probably not the only person who feels this way.

Everyone isn't always perfect at something, and that's perfectly fine. And knowing that you're limited in certain things doesn't mean that you can't achieve your dreams. You don't have to be hard on someone just because they can and you can't. Why don't you work with this person?

I personally believe that half of your ego problems will be solved if you accept them on the one hand and on the other hand don't use them as a competition fight against yourself and others.

FAILURES ARE PART OF THE PROCESS - WORK WITH THEM NOT AGAINST.

Mucho Love,

Estefania